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Monstrous Existence

by Marcelyn

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1.
Friday 13 01:39
I watched from my window, But it happened so quietly. The news broke and then so did we. They told us in a letter By carrier pigeon. It came on a Friday 13th. Now you're here and I'm there And we aren't anywhere.
2.
Empty Room 03:49
I come from madness. I'll bring the pain. I'll become your drug of choice. You'll shoot me through your pouring veins. I'm no good for you. You're never mad at what I do. I'm just a storm inside your peace of mind. I'll break you down, Just give it time. Your eyes a mirror of what I can't control. I see you Searching for the best in me. I don't know what to show you. Can you hear me? I've got a ghost inside my bones. It knows when I am not alone. It drags me to an empty room. I feel it tearing us apart. Darling, you know that's just the start 'Cause when it's done with me it'll come right after you, Come right after you. You come from kindness. You ease the pain. You quiet the voice inside That's telling me that I'm insane. You're too good for me And I'm not really what you see. You're breaking down my guarded heart. You deserve me coming clean. Your eyes a mirror of what I can't control. I see you Searching for the best in me. I don't know what to show you. Can you hear me? I've got a ghost inside my bones. It knows when I am not alone. It drags me to an empty room. I feel it tearing us apart. Darling, you know that's just the start 'Cause when it's done with me it'll come right after you, Come right after you. You've cracked the mirror. It's becoming clearer. You can chose the light now Or I can drag you deeper. Can you hear me? I've got a ghost inside my bones. It knows when I am not alone. It drags me to an empty room. I feel it tearing us apart. Darling, you know that's just the start 'Cause when it's done with me it'll come right after you, Come right after you.
3.
Guilloteens 03:21
I said "hey, how are you?" He said "hi, I'm doing fine, Except that's a lie. I feel like dying almost all the time, But how are you?" Said "I'm doing ok, Except that's not what I meant to say. I'm tired and lonely and broke Most of these days." He said "at least you're doing everything you've dreamt about." I said "at least you're taking better care of yourself." He said "I know one day we'll both figure it out, I have no doubt, But in the meantime, keep reminding yourself... You're working hard. You're doing fine. And everything you want will come to you in time. You're working hard. You're doing fine. And everything you want will come to you in time. It just takes so much time." I said "the planet's burning, The country's failing, And we don't have enough time." He said "I know, But you can't think like that if you Want to survive And you deserve to thrive Or die trying. You deserve to thrive 'cause... You're working hard. You're doing fine. And everything you want will come to you in time. You're working hard. You're doing fine. And everything you want will come to you in time. It just takes so much time." I said "it's been nice talking to you." He said "you too."
4.
Watch the clock Don't you stop Baby, don't you want to go? Down to get it all back. Feel the cities breathe. Seem em' bleed. Don't you know? All that you're feeling Is only a feeling. Feel the wind blow. Can you feel it growing cold? With their false shrines Battle lines get drawn. Hear the cities cry. Watch em die. Don't you know?" All that you're feeling Is more than a feeling We're not going anywhere! No, no we won't go! Tear it all down because you make it so Hard, with cheap talk and lies! If the world's gonna burn We're the ones Who set it on fire! Watch the clock. Don't you stop. Hey, come on, let's go. Ride the tide right back (To where it started from) Feel the earth move. Let it groove. Don't you know? They're stealing everything, Everything from you. We're not going anywhere! No, no we won't go! Tear it all down because you make it so Hard, with cheap talk and lies! If the world's gonna burn We're the ones Who set it on fire!
5.
Feet bare and broken, Walking down the filthy sidewalk. Eyes red and heavy, Torn and wanting anything but here. Paralyzed fingers grasp at nothing, Pulling hair I'm not sure is mine. This is how it ends, Another long night wasted. This is how it ends, A shot and a bottle to chase it. This is how it ends. So wise up now and face it Or this is how it ends. "Is this what you really wanted, What you asked for?" Mind racing way too fast to slow down, Don't tell me to calm down. Heart stopping heartbreak it pounds Louder than a drum. This is how it ends, Another long night wasted. This is how it ends, A shot and a bottle to chase it. This is how it ends. So wise up now and face it Or this is how it ends. This is how it ends, Another long night wasted. This is how it ends, A shot and a bottle to chase it. This is how it ends. So wise up now and face it Or this is how it ends.
6.
Number A 02:33
You tell me you're sorry for things that you never do. You take your coffee with cream, like you used to. You ask for my advice, like you want it. You float down like you're haunted. But still I'll wait for you. Don't worry, I could never let you go. But still I'll wait for you. Don't worry, I could never let you go, Could never let you go. Don't act like you know what you want. Don't act like you know what you're not. Don't tell me you'd take it all back if you could. I already know you would. But still I'll wait for you. Don't worry, I could never let you go. But still I'll wait for you. Don't worry, I could never let you go, Could never let you go.
7.
The streets are all silent, The concrete at bay. The schools and the churches Are closed now every day. The people are waiting For some kind of sign, But no one has answers. They keep shrugging and saying "it's fine." But no one knows anything anymore. No one knows anything anymore! No one has answers and no one knows why, So we hide. But evil is shapeless, It doesn't have a name. It creeps into the places We visit every day, So no one goes anywhere anymore. No one does anything anymore! No one is safe and nobody can hide, But we try. Take me outside, feel the sunshine...
8.
Sled Ted 02:14
I shrink myself down into bite-sized pieces But somehow they still all choke. Fistfuls of folly and foot-in-mouth, You should've swallowed before you spoke. My cool composure is wearing thinner As he calls me "emotional" with that shit-eating grin. Don't even try to pretend that you like what you see. I don't want to hear you lie through your grinding teeth. Hey, why do you talk to me that way? Yeah, I couldn't use that tone even if I tried. Tell me, what about me said I needed you to come fix my life? Now here we go again, Talking over me, Eyes filled with fire, Mouth bruised and bloodied, And as you speak you spit crimson into my eyes And swear up and down you're a real nice guy. Hey, why do you talk to me that way? Yeah, I couldn't use that tone even if I tried. Tell me, what about me said I needed you to come fix my life? Hey, why do we always play this game? Yeah, I'm not tryna be cute, not tryna be nice. Tell me what about me said I needed you to come fix my life?
9.
In the final moment, I felt myself caving in. I felt my lungs shatter as it started to sink in. We know we don't want to leave, But we know we have to. It's over, now the show is over. It's over. The curtains closed, The credits rolled. It's over, It's time to go home. They gave us the broken pieces as consolation, As if they even mattered, But it gave confirmation. We tried so hard to glue it back, But it splintered. It's over, now the show is over. It's over. The curtains closed, The credits rolled. It's over, It's time to go home. Time to go home. It's over...

credits

released September 25, 2020

Marcelyn, the band, is:
Marcelyn Lebovitz - vocals, ukulele, kalimba
Travis Martin - drums, guitar, keyboards, banjo
Mike Lebovitz - bass

All songs by Marcelyn, the band.
Produced, mixed, mastered, etc. by Travis Martin at TLK Studios.
Cover art "Flight from Domesticity" by Lila Planavsky.

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Marcelyn Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

Marcelyn is a multidisciplinary singer and artist whose creations are something both fragile and deadly with a heavy helping of kick ass. Marcelyn’s music serves up singer-songwriter-y indie rock weirdness on a silver platter with a side of powerful vocals and cleverly crafted lyrics. ... more

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